April 2005

Yawner Held in Contempt of Court

The Los Angeles Times reports that a judge fined a potential juror $1000 earlier this month for yawning during voir dire. The man, whose name was not revealed, also told Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Craig Veals “I’m sorry, but I’m really…


St. Louis Woman Sues After Bird Assault

Rhonda Nichols, of Centreville, Illinois, sued Lowe’s Hardware after allegedly being “attacked and seriously injured” by a bird that flew into the back of her head while she was shopping at an area hardware store. According to the suit, the…


Update – Pirate Captain Wins As Predicted

Previously I reported on the campaign of a candidate known only as “Pirate Captain” to be student body president at N.C. State University. As I predicted, he won. Pirate Captain, whose name is now revealed to be Will Piavis, won…



Beetle-Hunting Lawyer Held at Gunpoint by Police

I couldn’t really improve on that original headline. The New York Law Journal reported today that a federal judge has upheld a verdict dismissing a lawyer’s civil-rights lawsuit against the Scarsdale police department for using excessive force while arresting him…


Airport Camel-Suit Thief Facing Dismissal

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times: Pack your camel costumes securely, people! The only thing worse than trying to get that thing packed in the first place is seeing a baggage handler running around wearing…


Cookie Monster Will Now Advocate Eating in Moderation

The Associated Press reports this week that Sesame Street’s Cookie Monster, long known for scarfing down any and all cookies in sight as well as a variety of other objects, will now emphasize moderation in eating, in recognition of the…


Messages Not to Leave for a Judge, #47

In its April issue, Harper’s Magazine reprinted voice-mail messages left by attorney Bruce Tassan for the judges who had ruled against his client in a trademark appeal. Apparently, Mr. Tassan left at least one message for each of the three…



Michelangelo’s David Declared Obscene in Indiana

Officials in Bartholomew County, Indiana, have told a business that sells copies of classical art that it must move certain statues out of view because they would be considered obscene under Indiana law. The statutes include copies of Michelangelo’s David…