Pleading Archive

Each of the following pleadings has already been filed, somewhere, and so is in the public domain and may be used freely.  NOTE: Lowering the Bar does not warrant or represent that use of any of these pleadings will get you anything other than sanctioned -- although some of them have in fact worked.  Use at your own risk.

Complaints

• For discrimination in law-school grading based upon your poor typing skills

• If asserting a right to change places with the President of the United States

• If the defendants went ahead and cheated their neighbor, went ahead and cheated a friend

• If you need a hand-written divorce petition (graphics included)

• If Michael Jordan, your twin, has been ruining your life

• If you have an intellectual-property dispute with another manufacturer of iPhone fart applications

• For the destruction of one (1) red Prada suit, said destruction rendering one (1) red Prada purse and two (2) red Prada shoes also valueless

• If you have been spooked into falling off a deck by someone who negligently attempted to fire a bottle rocket out of his anus

Civil Procedure/Discovery/Trial Practice

• Motion to Compel Acceptance of Lunch Invitation (order granting same)

• Motion to Compel Opposing Counsel to Wear Appropriate Shoes

• Motion for a Fist Fight

Motions to Continue

• On the grounds that deer season is about to begin

• On the grounds that your dog just had puppies

• On the grounds that LSU will be playing for the national championship that day

Appellate Practice

• Notice of appeal (if intending to insult trial judge)