Sinking Pedal Boat Ends Ridiculous Escape Attempt

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Palm Harbor, Florida. Nicholas Hammond gets up to use the bathroom and finds someone burglarizing his home. Burglar flees, with Hammond in pursuit. Burglar leaps on getaway bike he has hidden a block away, but is unable to pedal fast enough to keep Hammond from catching him on foot. Burglar draws pocket knife, causing Hammond to back off and call police. Burglar flees down the street. Street turns out to be a dead end bordering on a lake. With deputies closing in, burglar leaps into boat and tries to escape across lake. Unfortunately, boat, like bicycle, is foot-powered, bringing pedaling deficiency back into play.

As burglar slowly thrashes out into lake, police helicopter is summoned. Helicopter crew reports that “there [is] a lone male pedaling the boat dressed only in boxer shorts, and the boat appear[s] to be taking on water.” Deputies enlist a local pontoon-boat owner to pursue the man attempting to flee in a sinking pedal boat, who is captured after what was likely one of the slowest and least-exciting police pursuits since authorities in New Jersey pulled over that drunken Zamboni driver.

“We’ve had suspects try to jump in the water before,” said a police spokesman, “but never before have I seen a pedal boat used as a means of [attempted] escape.”