Chuvit Kamolvisit, known in Thailand as “Tycoon Tub” for the chain of massage parlor/sex shops that made him rich, staged a flamboyant public spectacle on Friday after his election to parliament, saying he was ritually cleansing himself of his former sins and would work in the future only as an honest legislator. Among other things, Chuvit smashed a symbolic bathtub with a sledgehammer, then lay down in a coffin from which he emerged, shouting “Tycoon Tub is dead!” He then washed his hands in a Buddhist monk’s bowl to cleanse himself of evil.
Why couldn’t Bill Clinton just have done this and spared us all the impeachment business?
Chuvit apologized for his past. “I apologize to the Thai public for the business I did in the past that might have damaged some people,” he said. “But I never evaded tax.” Oh, well, that’s okay then. Chuvit said he had sold his massage parlors and was now in the hotel and real estate business. He pledged to be an honest member of parliament who would work to “smash the castles of corruption” from now on.
“I swear to all sacred holy spirits they can curse me to bankruptcy if I cheat this country,” he said.