DOJ Says It Will Not Seek Extradition of Randy Quaid

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The Quaids According to the Santa Barbara DA's Office (via the ABA Journal), the Department of Justice has declined to pursue extradition proceedings against actor Randy Quaid and his wife, Evi.

As you may recall, the Quaids fled to Canada last year after they failed to appear in court on felony vandalism charges and warrants were issued for their arrest. They were later arrested in Vancouver, but told a judge there they wanted to seek asylum. This was not necessarily because of those warrants, but rather because they were being pursued by a shadowy group of celebrity assassins (killers who target celebrities, that is, not celebrities who kill), who they called the "Star Whackers."

I never did get an explanation as to why the Star Whackers, who the Quaids claim were responsible for the deaths of Heath Ledger and David Carradine, among others, could not find them in Canada just as easily.

That's especially true since the Quaids have not exactly kept a low profile since getting to Canada. Randy has been performing in a band called "Randy Quaid and the Fugitives" — here's a clip of them performing a song called "Star Whackers," which is quite bad — and the couple was featured in a Vanity Fair article a few months ago. According to this article in the Santa Barbara Independent, the couple made a film earlier this year (also creatively called "Star Whackers"), which does not seem to have been in theaters very long despite "starring a sometimes nude Quaid." I don't advocate violence, but if the Star Whackers were doing their job we at least would have been spared that image.

In declining the extradition request, the DOJ noted that the process is "resource-intensive and lengthy," and so is "usually reserved for more serious criminals." Not ridiculous ones like these, that is. You also have to think, although the DOJ didn't say it out loud, that on the whole we are probably fine with these people staying right where they are.