Baffling Mistakes Criminals Make All the Time

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The excellent comedy site specializes in lists, and I noticed that today's list addresses a subject frequently covered here, namely "Baffling Mistakes Criminals Apparently Make All the Time."  There are lots of ways to categorize these, but here is Cracked's list:

  • Make sure you have the proper tools [e.g., no bananas, snakes, or Star Trek props];
  • Fight the urge to give away personal information [a very frequent mistake];
  • Keep in mind that there is a time and a place for everything [do not check Facebook or make some fried chicken during the crime];
  • Choose your targets wisely [trying to rob a karate school or police convention is a bad idea];
  • Be wary of strangers offering you money/drugs [these are frequently police, or the person you stole that cell phone from]; and
  • Cover your tracks [or do not make any by walking through deep snow].

Also popular on Cracked recently: their list of "The Six Most Statistically Full of Sh*t Professions," which I am linking to because it seems true, it's funny, and maybe most importantly, because lawyers are not on the list.  The six professions were, in reverse order of being full of it:

  • Stock market experts
  • Wine tasters
  • Art critics
  • Criminal profilers
  • Weather forecasters
  • Sportswriters

I imagine that lawyers did not make this list because Cracked limited it to professions for which they had found a study that tested the accuracy rate and because lawyers may be better at avoiding predictions in the first place.  Weather forecasters especially would have trouble dodging that requirement.

Link: Lowering the Bar's "Criminal Mind" Category