Assorted Stupidity #156

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  • “One of the most unusual cases [I’ve seen in] 40 years,” said the lawyer defending a kidnapping victim who offered to lie on his kidnapper’s behalf for $5,000. The victim, who (obviously) had been released, started by taunting the kidnapper on Instagram, telling him to plead guilty “like a man.” But then he sent his phone number, saying “call me if you want to finesse trial.” “[C]ough up sum bread or sit in the feds for next 20 years,” he said, before concluding, “[y]our choice my boy idgaf,” followed by the heart and handshake emojis. The kidnapper gave screenshots to the authorities, who charged his former victim with bribery. This amounted to treating him “as an ‘accessory after the fact’ to his own kidnapping,” his lawyer argued, but idgaf.
  • Here’s a problem that might show up on the ethics portion of the bar exam—it’s a three-parter: (1) does a person necessarily lack the moral fitness and character required to practice law simply because he was convicted of a war crime? (2) What if the president pardoned him for that crime? (3) What if the president who pardoned him was Donald Trump? Feel free to share your answer(s) with the Oklahoma Bar Association, which will apparently be grappling with this problem next year. Cf. Convicted Killer Headed Back to Law School” (Sept. 1, 2011).
  • A South Korean woman who authorities say was obsessed with true-crime shows and books has confessed to killing someone “out of curiosity,” according to reports. Partly she was curious as to whether she could “commit a perfect crime,” police said. Turns out the answer was no. This was despite significant research, judging by the search history police found showing she had spent about three months researching “how to hide a body.” The results of that research: she took a cab to a “wooded area” and walked out into the wilderness lugging a suitcase, which was sufficiently odd that it prompted the cab driver to call the police.
  • Maybe she asked ChatGPT? If so, it isn’t much of an improvement over Siri, who someone put this same question to back in 2012, with similarly poor results. According to that report, Siri used to give “joke” answers if you asked her where to hide a dead body, but she no longer does that.
  • The world eagerly awaits the Edinburgh Sheriff Court’s decision, now said to be coming next week, as to whether Nicholas Rossi will be extradited to the United States. As we have discussed, Rossi is wanted for rape charges in Utah, but has twice faked his own death, changed identities, and fled to escape prosecution. Lately he has been claiming to be an Irish orphan named “Arthur Knight,” but there is good reason to believe the person claiming this is in fact Nicholas Rossi. See “Suspect Claiming Mistaken Identity Says Someone Tattooed Him Without His Knowledge” (Nov. 15, 2022).