Canadian Legal Alert: Canoeing Under the Influence Is Now Illegal
In which we consider whether a canoe qualifies as a “vessel.”
Canada
Court Invalidates Result of Rock-Paper-Scissors Match
Is this my longest article yet? Possibly. Is it worth it? Also possibly.
Sadly, I Must Report That There Was in Fact No “Canoe Chase”
Probably not even much of a negotiation to speak of.
Canada to Legalize Witchcraft
Technically, it is just decriminalizing the offense of pretending to practice witchcraft, but that would have been a crappy headline.
Man Accused of Nude Swim With Sharks Also Wanted for Assault at Medieval Times
It was a busy night.
UPDATE: Judge Rules Province Has No Duty to Recognize Bigfoot
British Columbia, at least, is off the hook.
“Crickets.”
Judicial shorthand that you may see more often in the future, especially if Judge Kavanaugh is confirmed.
New Assault Charges for Rogue Canadian Golfer Who Tried to Escape on Ice Floe
He managed to get out of this water hazard, but it didn’t do him much good.
The Montreal Screaming Ticket (or, Everybody Dance Now)
Give him the music, not a ticket.
Canada May Legalize Drunken Canoeing
It’s not the most important issue this bill would address, but it’s an issue.