Court Affirms Conviction for Making “Hand Gesture in the Form of a Gun”
No one was harmed during the pointing spree, which lasted only a few seconds.
Criminal
Dialogue in a Car on Route 107 in Nassau County, New York
PERSONS OF THE DIALOGUE: Timaeus, a driver; Socrates, a passenger; Lysimachus and Callicles, who do not speak.
Alleged Spanish Hit-Man Contract and Resumé Translated
Need a hit man who’s also trained in the “millennial arts” AND speaks Hawaiian? I have good news and bad news.
Again I Must Remind You That Dealing With a Hit Man Is Fraught With Peril
There’s more than one important lesson here, actually.
Suspect Located
“Hey bro,” the suspect reportedly said upon being discovered.
Attempt to Flee Australia on a Jet Ski Fails (90 Miles Later)
Impressive, but still unsuccessful.
A Form You Hopefully Won’t Need: Notice of Apology to Judge
Representing Roger Stone must be a real joy.
Stolen Swedish Crown Jewels Turn Up During Suspect’s Trial
Not what you normally expect to find when dumpster diving (I’m told).
Sadly, I Must Report That There Was in Fact No “Canoe Chase”
Probably not even much of a negotiation to speak of.
Beware: Botox Bandits Burgle Beautiful Brows
I would like to apologize for the headline, which I seemed to be powerless to prevent.