BREAKING: O.J. Simpson Freed
Really?! Sort of.
Crime and Punishment
Teens Charged With Exploiting Themselves
Let me just warn you in advance that the following sentence will make no sense at all: After a 16-year-old Fayetteville girl made a sexually explicit nude photo of herself for her boyfriend last fall, the Cumberland County Sheriff’s Office…
Wet Willy and Mr. Nub
Does administering a “wet willy” qualify as a crime? Well … it depends.
Norwegian Inmate Slowly Paddles to Freedom
With a little toy shovel, apparently.
TIP: He’s Probably Not Going to Show Your Snake to His Girlfriend
Here's a nice item from the Crime Blotter in the Columbia, SC, Free Times (thanks, Dedman): Craigslist Bandit: Authorities are looking for a man who has been stealing items from people when he meets up with them via Craigslist. First…
Judge Orders Defendant to Draw Him
According to the BBC (thanks, James), a judge in Northern Ireland has agreed to give a 16-year-old "one last chance" after the boy failed a drug test that showed he had (gasp!) consumed cannabis. After the boy's solicitor argued that…
Man Says He Danced on Police Car’s Roof to Summon Aid Against Vampires
Here's how this goes sometimes. Sometimes you write something you really like. And since you're kind of on a roll you don't stop to save it after every frickin' paragraph because you'd like to think that maybe the wifi network…
U.S. Government: Lasers are Evil
I ask for one thing: a shark with a frickin’ laser beam attached to its head. But no.
Naked Rambler Loses Another Appeal
A little misleading, because while he was in fact naked, he was appearing by video (from the waist up).
Cleveland Police Agree to Stop Hitting People on the Head With Guns
No, it's The Onion that makes up fake news stories, not me. In this case, I barely even had to tweak the headline: Cleveland Plain Dealer Seriously. According to the report, officers of the Cleveland Division of Police (CDP) hit people on…